Anyone can become a victim of domestic violence. Regular folks, as well as popular personalities, have been involved in domestic violence cases and those who have been proven guilty have served or are currently serving their time in prison. Domestic violence is definitely not a new problem, but it is a problem that is often concealed to others, and often denied and ignored by other members of a family and also by the abused. The recent incarceration of boxing champ Floyd Mayweather Jr. in a Las Vegas jail to serve a 90-day sentence for violent behavior against his ex-girlfriend has definitely made people remember that domestic violence is still a problem in many homes and relationships.
Is?domestic abuse?similar to domestic violence?
These two terms are almost the same, but with some slight difference. In general, domestic abuse, also known as spousal abuse, is when one person in a relationship dominates the other. The person who wants to be in control uses a number of weapons against his partner, including intimidation, fear, or guilt. When the dominant individual uses physical force or physical violence to control his partner, then it becomes domestic violence. It is also not unusual for the dominant one to hurt, not only his partner, but also the friends and relatives of the abused person.
How to Recognize an Abusive Relationship
Recognizing the problem is one of the most important steps in making a change. Many individuals believe that physical violence is the only sign of an abusive relationship. This isn?t so. Although physical violence is a sign that an abused person is in real danger, it is also very likely that the victim has suffered a lot of mental and emotional abuse. Even though mental or emotional abuse does not leave scars that can be seen, a victim will certainly feel its effects, which can also leave a lasting impression on her. A number of negative impacts are: loss of an individual?s sense of worth, loss of self-reliance or independence, and fearfulness.
A victim of domestic violence often shows certain characteristics. All of these can be evident even before physical violence occurs.
- A person feels fearful all the time
- A person feels like he/she is always doing something wrong
- A person feels helpless or powerless in a relationship
- A person feels that he/she deserves to be hurt
Someone who is in an abusive relationship will usually feel afraid of various things. She?s scared to bring up certain topics because she?s afraid that her partner is going to get mad at her because of it. Everything that an abusive partner dislikes can also become a source of fear for the abused person. Hence, the victim will avoid talking about issues that her partner does not like. She will also avoid doing anything that her partner finds objectionable. But no matter how hard a victim tries to please her abusive partner, her partner will always find something wrong, and then turn against her.
How to Recognize Violent/Controlling Behavior
A person who abuses his partner often manifests the following violent or controlling behavior:
- Has an unpredictable temper
- Often threatens abused partner and those close to her
- Destroys things and property
- Is always jealous
- Is often possessive
- May force partner to have sex
- May keep partner from her friends and loved ones
- Often controls finances, as well as transportation
Facing the Problem
As mentioned, one vital aspect here is for an abused person to recognize that he or she is abused. Once a person identifies the problem, he/she can seek help and guidance from families, friends, or even the proper government or non-government agencies. Male and female victims can ask for assistance from various groups, including the National Domestic Violence Hotline, Women?s Aid, and The Domestic Abuse Helpline for Men and Women.
Citations:
Claire Brown is a freelance writer who specializes in a number of legal issues, including domestic violence. Brown also writes for several bail bonds Hollywood companies.
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